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Author Name:  Crystal

Rating: PG

Disclaimer: All characters including Walter Skinner, Fox Mulder, Dana Scully 
and other relations to the show X-Files are owned by Fox, 1013 Productions
and Chris Carter.  No copyright infringment is intended.  No money
is being made.  All characters including Buffy Summers, Xander, Willow,
Giles and other relations to the show Buffy The Vampire Slayer are
owned by Warner Brothers.  No copyright infringment is intended.
  No money is being made.

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Waiting For A Miracle 


Buffy got off the bus and looked around her.  Where was she?  How far
had she traveled?  She wasn't sure if she was more upset that she 
was alone miles away from home or that she knew she had no option.

"X-tra special diner.  Cute," Buffy said these words out loud then
was embarrased to learn that there was noone around.

She entered the diner finding it empty,  except for an elderly lady who 
did not seem too happy to see her.  Buffy considered turning around and walking
to the next place, but she remembered that she didn't know where she
was and her stomach seemed to want something to knaw on.

Buffy slipped into a booth in the darkest corner of the diner and
picked up the menu which was neatly layed on the table.  Cheeseburger,
Hamburger, Meatloaf, Pepsi, French Fries.  Wow, what a selection.

The lady came over to her.  Buffy slunk timidly into her seat.  She
wasn't afraid of vampires, but ordinary people did give her the 
willies.

"I'll have the Cheeseburger, Fries, and Pepsi."

The woman scribbled something down and walked away, never even looking
up to see who was talking.  Thankfully, she returned quickly with 
the Pepsi which Buffy furiously drank.

She started to look out the window, but noticed a very handsome man 
enter the diner.  He was dressed in a leather jacket and one of his
arms was hanging loosely from his body.  In fact, Buffy was pretty
sure the arm was not real at all. 

The man went up to the edlerly lady and she again scribbled something
in her note book.  The man came over to Buffy.

"May I sit down."

"Free world. Well, free booth anyway."

"What's a pretty girl like you doing sitting out in the middle of no
where, all alone?"

It had been a while since someone had flirted with Buffy, but she
knew a desperate pick-up line when she heard one.

"Sorry, I'm trouble."

The man had a devious smile across his face.  This scared Buffy a bit.

"I'm sure I'm more trouble than you are."

This was a challenge that Buffy was willing to take as the edlerly
woman brought out two plates of cheeseburgers and fries.

"What have you done," Buffy asked, partly in jest.

" You first."

"Let's see.  Got expelled from school.  Got kicked out of the house
by my mother.  Killed my boyfriend literally and emotionally.  
Betrayed the only friends I ever had. Shall I go on?"

The man looked a little shocked, but was unphased by Buffy's admissions.

"Geez, I've just been involved in conspiracies to help an alien race
take over the world.  Really, though, things will get better."

"How, How will things get better?"

"There's always the future.  Have a more positive attitude,"
 the man was starting to wonder if he wanted to spend anymore time with
this girl.


Buffy exploded.

"How?  How can I be more positive?  I was chosen from the time I was
younger than I even know to be who I am.  I had no choice then.  I
was created to be who I was.  At first I ignored it, sure there were
the creepy dreams and wierd feelings, but hey nothing to worry about
right?  Then I find out what I really am and what do I get from it
then, I lose my father.  Then what.  I finally find someone who I
love more than anything in the world.  The one person who I thought
I could trust and then I do everything I possible can to make him
happy and he turns against me, whether it was his fault or just 
something that happened doesn't really matter. So he hurts me like
everyone has done, like everything that I have been fighting against.
Again, I end up alone.  Sure there's Giles and Willow and Cordelia
and Xander and I guess, when she isn't too busy trying to put the
blame on herself, there's Mom, but they just can't understand, there's
no way they can.  They try to understand me, but ultimately I hurt
them too by dragging them into my messed up existence.  And nothing
is ever going to change.  How can I ever fall in love again knowing
what I know, being what I am?  How can any of this ever go away?
How can I ever find someone who is willing to stay with me for
more than a brief moment of my existence? Sure I can run from state
to state, but the dreams still come, the monsters still come.
 I can never not be a slayer.  So please don't tell me to
be positive."

Buffy finished the line, but realized that the man had left long ago.
Of well, what's new. Don't they all just run away from her.  She
finished her burger.  Left some money on the table and headed out
for who knows, but to what?  That question she will always know the 
answer, too. 








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